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8/1/2023

3 Tweets

1 Comment

Read Now
 
I remember being on Twitter and coming across a thread of tweets that literally made my heart race. I had never had someone read my mind before, and these three tweets affirmed, solidified, justified, and any other “FIEDs” you can think of! Oh yes, Ms. Ma’am...Keri Hilson came with the truth, the whole truth, and nothing BUT the truth! What were the tweets you ask… ok, hold on, let me set it up.

Can I get my single, black women in their mid-40s to come to the front, please? Yes, yes, because I know y’all will feel me if no one else does.

So this dating scene, though!?! Period. That’s it. That’s the setup. Because honestly, the girls that get it, get it, and my 40+ ladies definitely got it!
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Let me be for real…Ms. Keri Baby let off three tweets that really had me shook. I evaluate my life often. Different parts on different days, and I’d given the “Love Life” compartment a little look-see. You know, to see what needed to change, what I want or need now that may have been different six months ago. What I found was while I need to tweak some things here and there, I can honestly say it really SUCKS to be single right now. I mean, dating is really trash, and now that I’m older, I’m kinda like…Yeah, NAH!

And it’s not only because it’s pee in the pool but because I’m tired of being judged for protecting me. What I mean by that is, me intentionally putting up guards till you get tired of holding up that mask and I see the “REAL” you.

HERE ARE THE TWEETS:
  1. Even successful, strong women want to feel safe enough to be soft. That is our true nature.
  2. The man who makes me feel safe will have the world.
  3. Men who provide emotional security and display wise leadership will get the softest, most feminine, relaxed, trusting, “guard down,” submissive, nurturing version of their woman.

When I read those words, all I said was…This is it! Perfectly stated. So many times, I’ve tried to articulate this to men I’ve dealt with. You have to understand the amount of BS, time-wasting, relational abuse that women have dealt with to know why there are so many layers to us and why our guards are up.

No, I’m not saying it’s the man’s fault or that they should have to pay for another man’s mistake, not at all. But what I am saying is how many times has a woman loved your hurt away, loved you to where you were supposed to be, loved you until you loved yourself again? So many times, women have done this from the purest place, only to be broken in return. So many women (Me…I am women, lol) LONG to submit and be led by a man who exhibits strength and Godly wisdom.

​When I feel secure, I will give you the world. That doesn’t mean you have it all together...it means you are on a path; you have given your future, OUR future, forethought and are putting in the work to bring it to fulfillment.

Ok, ladies, so now that we’ve put that very important piece of information out for consumption by men, can we agree that we should TRY to at least let the drawbridge down? LOL, really, though… I’m not saying let them in the castle, but we gotta give a little to get a little, yes? Let me know. 

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1 Comment
Bryson M link
9/1/2024 02:15:38 pm

Hi thanks for sharingg this

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    NishaSpeaks, COLUMNIST

    Tonisha, affectionately known as “NISHA” by family and friends, has always had a flair for words. ​So much so that she would later acquire the moniker "NishaSpeaks". Her talents have made room for her with several on-air radio broadcasts, including her podcast, The NishaSpeaks Podcast, JoyNet Radio, Hot 96.5 LR, and KWCP 98.9. She has also been featured in Curvy Connect Magazine. Her experiences have inspired her to become one of the Greats.

    NishaSpeaks is an advocate for plus-sized women, and an active model for the Kurvy Kuties Full Figure Modeling Group. Her playfulness and fierceness is effortless on the runway and it shines through her frames, her speech and  her strides. And when NishaSpeaks...You Listen!

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ur·bane \ər-ˈbān\: adj. notably polite or polished in manner
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  • HOME
  • CURRENT ISSUE
  • SIGNATURE
    • Women of Worth
    • Men of Merit
    • URBANE's Finest
    • Black Arkansas Educators
    • D9 Stronger Together
    • Black Arkansas Graduates
    • Fathers' Day Tributes >
      • 2022 Fathers
      • 2021 Fathers
    • Mothers' Day Tributes >
      • 2022 Mothers
      • 2021 Mothers
  • HIGHLIGHTS
    • Readers' Choice
    • Arkansas Black History
    • URBANE Stories
    • NishaSpeaks
    • Listen First
    • Business Spotlight
    • URBANE Eats
  • GALLERY
  • STORE
    • Individual Issue
    • Subscription
    • Donate
  • Advertise with Us
    • Purchase Ad
  • CONTACT URBANE
    • Submit a Request
    • Press Releases >
      • Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc.
    • About URBANE
    • Meet the Crew
    • Join the Team
    • LEGAL >
      • FAQs
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        • Advertisement Purchases
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